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Debriefing

The Weekly continues its quest to eradicate ignorance, one blog entry at a time.

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June 5, 2008 · 4:46 PM

The Seventh Sign: K-Fed to be awarded “father of the year” award

By Aaron Thompson

K-fed in all his glory

If you need any more proof that our society is getting ready to go belly-up in an extraordinarily decadent firestorm of xenophobia, consumerism and irrefutable broadband-streamed ignorance, all you have to do is look at the perceived standards of parenting in the 21st century.

Which is why then it really should be no shock that about every friggin’ blog site on earth is saying that Las Vegas nightclub Prive has awarded Ex-Brittany beau Kevin “K-Fed” Federline their father of the year award, set to be handed out at the club on June 13.

While the Prive rep we spoke with wouldn’t confirm or deny these rumors, apparently this isn’t the first time Fed’s won father of the year accolades. Last year Details magazine named both he and Ex Anna Nicole Smith partner Larry Birkhead fathers of the year. Details wrote:

"The New Dad, as represented by Kevin and Birkhead, is involved. He trucks the kids to the supermarket, decorates their bedrooms, and even lets them dictate the direction of his career."

Prive nightclub located in Planet Hollywood, outside of being, you know, a nightclub, is apparently an authority on the subject of parenting. According to an article from Australian Web site LiveNews.com.au, Prive has a ”fine history” as a “dignified and “reputable parental institution, and lends a great sense of credibility and gravitas to Federline's accolade.” Never mind all that drinking, skirt chasing and God knows what else happens in the recesses of Vegas’ expansive club land. Prive knows good parenting and isn’t afraid to show it. Maybe if Pure Management Group opened up a daycare, the Feds wouldn’t be all up on their junk.

And let’s not even get into what career moves K-Fed’s chilluns could have steered him towards. I guess you get what you pay for.

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